Debra Guzman, 23 years old
When it comes to post-breakup dating, there are two main philosophies: One is that, if you date right after a breakup, you're rebounding, which is unhealthy. Then there's the whole idea that "the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. How long should you really wait to date after a breakup? Paulette Kouffman Sherman, Psy. If you dated someone for a year or more, you may need three to four months. On the other taking a break from dating after a break up, you might need less time if your relationship was very short.
When couples hit a roadblock, they usually weigh the pros and cons of staying together and breaking up. But there's a third option that's rarely granted any thought: taking a break. As Chris Armstrong, a dating and relationships coach tells Bustle, breaks in relationships are usually about one of two things: someone needs to reflect internally on things like commitment or insecurity issues, or someone needs to reflect externally and figure out whether the relationship is right. While some couples realize down taking a break from dating after a break up road that their breaks should've been breakups, others recover from them and go on to enjoy happy, healthy relationships. To find out which of these scenarios seems most common and which others might occur, I asked people what happened when they took breaks from relationships. This is just a small sample, though, so it might help to look at data. One study in the Journal of Marriage and Family found that only a third of couples who got back together after breaking up stayed together.
The utter sadness and despair you feel post-breakup is exacerbated by the fears of fix ups, loneliness, considering Match. Take your time. You dont want to bring baggage from your broken heart into a brand new relationship, and no one likes to be a rebound. You feel like the best way to get you over this breakup is to fall head over heels all over again. Focus on keeping it light.
Taking a break from dating after a break up
More about taking a break from dating after a break up:
Here's how to inoculate ourselves against negative ones. Verified by Psychology Today. None of the old problems will exist in a new relationship, you think. All those interesting, attractive people who were taking a break from dating after a break up before you married are probably still waiting around, eager to go out with the newly-single you not to mention all the eligible strangers online. Some people love dating after divorce or a breakup. They fell in love again, but much later, often after the kids went off to college.
Taking a break, a pause, a beat, whateveris an option for couples in tense relationships to step back and think. Most people assume that taking a break in a relationship is just the prelude to a breakup. Chris Armstrong, a dating and relationships coach tells Bustle that taking a break in a relationship is about one of two things — either someone needs time to reflect internally on things like commitment or insecurity issues, or to reflect externally on whether this relationship is right. It sounds scary. These pauses are necessary, especially if taking a break from dating after a break up or both partners decide they need to work on their personal issues, Monica Parikh, dating and relationships coachtells Bustle.
One of the hardest things to do after you break up with someone is re-adapt to being single. Have you spent some quality time with yourself? Allow yourself to feel all the feelings — even the ugly ones that make you want to throw stuff against the wall. You can own up to the role you played in the breakup. Part of moving on is being able to own up to your own personal BS and mistakes — even if that mistake was dating your ex in the first place.